Meditation on Obedience

"I sought the Lord, and He answered me"

I am always amazed at the reaction of God when I come to him, pleading for mercy, after I have spat in the face of His Son by disobedience. It seems a torturous position for a child of God to be in when obedience is the one thing he longs for and seems to be the one thing that evades him. Could it be that the definition of obedience, rather than obedience herself, has evaded him? Or does he continue as he is treating obedience as perfection, keeping every commandment of God? And if he fails in this endeavor, he is sent away with such a tumult of guilt that no amount of grace can mend the wounds wrought by this cycle of apostasy. 

I am beginning to think that obedience is not synonymous with perfection. And perhaps I am taking far too much liberty in these definitions as I am not a worthy candidate to handle such lofty things and declare my meditations as true. Yet, if not only for my sake, my mind must make sense of these subjects for me to live to God. Could it be that obedience is the understanding that the cohesiveness of both chastity and grace perpetuate a lifestyle that is both humility before God and joy in Him? What I mean to say is that I think obedience is similar to what Romans 4 speaks about as rest:

"Now to the one who works, his wages are not counted as a gift but as his due. And to the one who does not work but trusts him who justifies the ungodly, his faith is counted as righteousness"

It is the cohesiveness of both grace and chastity! Our fallen state necessitates grace because of our sin and yet our renewed creation (2 Corinthians 5:17) causes a longing to obey whatever the Father may ask. Our hearts break when we disobey Him  (and rightfully so) but they should never become hopeless if we indeed see that His Spirit bears witness of our son-ship (Romans 8:16). 

God has been gracious to me this morning. He has caused me to remember it was Him who saved me out of sin and this world, and it is Him that will continue to do so: that while I yet fail, He ever intercedes for me. And this truth causes me with great joy to run to Christ, my reward :)